My sphincter tightens with nerves every time my kids ask
“What do you think it is Mum?”
Here’s what happened last night
Miss 6: hey Mum, look at my drawing.
Me: wow, that’s fantastic!
Miss 6: can you tell what it is?
Me: ummm….yeah. Is it a Phoenix rising from the ashes?
Miss 6: huh? A what? No it’s not
Me: oh… is it a giant?
Miss 6: NO!
Me: is it a dog drinking water?
Miss 6 frustrated and looking at me like I’m a moron: NO!!!!!!
Me: is it a…ummmmm….oh yeah….it’s a ummmm
Miss 6 getting pissed at me now: Muuuuuummmmmm! It’s a talking shoe on a see-saw riding on the ocean
Me: oh yeah, I can see that!
My inside voice: WTAF? A talking shoe on a faaaarking see-saw??? How on earth could I ever guess that?
My guilty mum inside voice five minutes later: omg, my daughter is such an artist. I can’t wait to see her art hanging in the Louvre.