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Bali is a wonderful place to go for a family…

Bali is a wonderful place to go for a family holiday. The sun, surf, culture, massages, heat, pools, cocktails, kids club, no housework or cooking and the incredibly lovely Balinese. That is what I looked forward to, pure relaxation for us and loads of entertainment for the kids.

I put my back out at the same time Jetstar cancelled our flight just before we were due to leave. Of course Jetstar didn’t have anything to do with the injury but I have to blame someone and the husband wouldn’t cop to it. And when I say “put my back out” I mean out…not just a little bit out, I’m talking out as in gone for the day and not coming back till 3am drunk out.

For the first 7 days or so I was bent over with the God forsaken bulging disc. I went to a Chemist and asked the Pharmacist for something to relieve the pain as Nurofen just wasn’t cutting it. On the advice that the drug given “was what we give to people with broken legs so it’ll be ok” I decided to go with it.

So…I took 2 tablets the next morning and went to the breakfast buffet with the husband and kids. Half way through my toast I remember staring off into the distance between bites and slowly realising I was completely off my chops. I know I smiled a lot and had some pretty ridiculous thoughts while carrying on a conversation with the lady at the next table. I spent the entire day in bed watching a movie and rewinding it every twenty minutes or so as I kept forgetting what I’d seen. I guess there’s a reason for prescriptions in Australia.

On day 4 I got covered in hives and day 6 saw a lovely heat rash crawl its way across my torso. I looked like the Hunchback of Notre Dame with the pox. Day 7 and my back started to come good. YAY!!!! On Day 7 night I was lucky enough to enjoy Bali Belly for the first time.

Yup…that painful crampy poo thing attacked me with a vengeance. It enabled me to break into a cold sweat in 28 degree temperatures while chewing on Imodium and Buscopan. It made my children giggle hearing my belly sounds and when mummy sang on the loo. Sentences were interrupted with sphincter tightening facial expressions and I knew where every toilet was within a 2-mile radius.

Believe it or not, the last day of Bali I came good. Which is a bit of a mother chucker, but one has to look on the bright side; there were staff on hand to do the cleaning and cooking, drinks were cold, kids had fun, husband is tanned and relaxed and the Bali Belly probably helped with only a nominal holiday weight gain.

Happy days all round I say.

5 thoughts on “Bali is a wonderful place to go for a family…

  1. OMG!!! That is priceless. I shouldn’t be laughing at your misfortune, but I can’t help it. No bikini shopping…..nappy shopping instead

  2. Oh dear Fiona 😖😩 sounds like a trauma in heaven 😉

  3. So could you poop through the eye of a needle at 20 paces?? That’s when you know you’ve got it good! Hope you tried to kill it with cocktails… XXxXx

  4. But how about that kids club!!!! 😝

  5. Bloody brilliant!! Hope your sphincter gets well soon. 😘

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