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Leave my damn 80’s songs alone

Yesterday I heard a cover version of Sonia Dada’s ‘You Don’t Treat Me No Good’ and nearly cried.

And no, it wasn’t because of any particular hysterical first boyfriend-drama memory. I nearly cried because hearing a remake of a song from my past just really pisses me off – and I cry when I’m cranky. Or premenstrual. Or hungry. Or sad. Or happy. Or watching ‘Bridges of Madison County”

Re-doing songs with a new artist is like Tom Cruise playing Jack Reacher. Just incredibly wrong and makes me want to have a very long toilet stop.

When I hear a song from my earlier days, I love the minute or two of memories that invade my mind. Good or bad – it always gives you a worthwhile memory jolt. Sonia Dada memories were of friends singing and changing the words on bus trips, days drinking and perhaps a little bit of front-seat pashing. Because I was old enough to be that mature and pash in the front.

Now when I hear new versions of older songs it just taints my memories.

Like last year when Tracy Chapman’s ‘Fast Car’ was completely and utterly assaulted. “Wow” said my youngsters, laying credit to some trashy singer who couldn’t hope to compete with the angst-ridden Tracy. “Ooooooh, I really love that new song”.

So, I played M1, M2 and M3 the original Tracy version and they all preferred the new version.

HEART. BROKEN. I decided not to feed them for a week as punishment.

Only joking. It was like 3 days, max.

WHAT. THE. FAAAARK.

Don’t get me started on other songs and singers i’ve loved. Bonnie Tyler? Don’t touch her. Prince? Don’t even think about it. Toni Basil, anything by The Police, Bruce Springsteen, 1927, Simple Minds, Cyndi Lauper, Tears for Fears, Talking Heads, Bon Jovi (I have friends that would literally kill a singer for touching Jon’s music) Rick Springfield, WHAM! Irene Cara, Laura Branigan, Sheen Easton (please don’t ever redo ‘Strut’, I would seriously cry) Kenny and Dolly, Johnny Cash, ….I mean seriously, the list just goes on and on….and on and on.

So please, radio producers, announcers, programmers, recording labels etc….Please don’t assault my ears with anymore remakes.

Please just pay someone to write new crappy songs that my kids will treasure and be protective of when they’re adult enough to cherish their memories.

So in other words, please just leave Sonia Dada and the like the faaark alone.

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